There have been so many interesting stories in the news lately about engaged couples breaking up and suing over the return of the engagement ring.
There is a lot of talk about what is and what’s not “proper” when the engagement or pending nuptial is called off.
Most people consider engagement rings conditional gifts and the census is that it should be returned if the nuptial doesn’t take place. However, some people feel that it depends on the circumstances surrounding the breakup.
Of course, having been married five times and proposed to a total of eighteen times, this topic got me to thinking…
What is the right thing to do when the pending marriage is called off? Should a woman return the ring?
Even with my numerous marriage proposals, I’ve never had an issue with returning the ring simply because I’ve never accepted a ring from a man I didn’t intend to marry, but I do recall an incident about nine years ago where I accepted a ring from a man with the intent to marry him but before the event took place, I called the wedding off.
I didn’t return the ring because I felt that he had committed fraud so he didn’t deserve the ring back. The ring cost $4,800.00, I know because a few weeks prior to him proposing, he took me to the jeweler just to get my opinion on whether or not I liked it. After he proposed he encouraged me to rent out my home and move in with him since we were making preparations to merge our finances.
However, six weeks after he proposed I found out totally by accident that three weeks after he proposed to me he went and filed bankruptcy without informing me. I was livid, and not only called off the engagement, I broke it off with him.
When he asked for the ring back, I replied “Hell no! Just consider whatever I get from selling it, my first months rent and security deposit on my new place!”
I was upset because I had just recently rented out my home and couldn’t break their lease. I ended up taking the ring back to the jeweler who sold it to him and the jeweler gave me $2,400.00 for it. (½ of the original price that my ex-fiancee paid for it)
The point is, incidents such as this are happening every day. Many women are making major lifestyle changes based on building a future with her potential husband-to-be. Oftentimes, leaving great paying jobs and relocating to be with him based off building a future together. It appears that most of the time it is the woman who makes sacrifices in order to accommodate her future husband.
How many people look at the engagement ring as a binding contract?
When major purchases are made such as expensive jewelry, it comes with the agreement that it can be returned to the store within an allotted amount of time for a full refund. If a man proposes and the woman doesn’t accept, he’s not out of anything, he can return the ring to the store and get his money back.
But what happens if the woman accepts and incurs financial expenses from planning the pending nuptial?
Anyone who’s ever planned a wedding knows that wedding’s are expensive. If the man later breaks that engagement (by intent or by actions) should she be allowed to keep the ring to try and recoup some of those expenses? Or should she give the ring back?
Ladies and gentlemen, what do you think?
The G-Spot! with Glenda A. Wallace 